How Did I Get Here, And Where Is The Next Turn?

Greetings and salutations to all who deem this worthy of your time...

Brought up Jun 15, 2014

The Imp Lurking...

I have times lately that I just can not seem to figure out these days. They make me wonder if I really have a firm grasp on reality.

If I don't, that's fine. I like the way those times feel.. Go ahead, bring on the straight jacket if one must. The imp lurking behind my eyes just dares someone to try...

I will admit, it started with Eat, Pray, Love. The movie had me sobbing, right? I think I am avoiding the book so as to preserve what it made me feel, just in case the movie was not as true to the book as so many these days tend to be.

There are days when it feels like there is something cracking open inside me. I've had that before, but it's happening more often these days.

The boss made a joke the other day. She said she thought I was one of the teenagers... Of course I rolled my eyes, snorted very unladylike and shook my head. Yet, there was a little voice in my head that whispered with a giggle... ""You've been found out!"

Do you ever feel like that? Like you are wandering through life incognito or even forget for a time that you are not 20 something or 30 something, only to be shocked when you look in the mirror and this old person is staring at you?

Worse, you see a twinkle in those eyes looking back that says, Yep, I'm still here. Those wrinkles and that gray are just camo baby! It's just one of those masks that you hide behind, chick.

My biggest fear is that one of these days, that twinkling imp is going to push the mask aside, and do something so awesomely stupid that she gives away the secret...

And lands the body she occupies in the nut house, or at least in front of a judge...

Or just make everyone laugh at my stupid antics and realize that this is just the body, just the transportation of a mixed up, slightly lost, but still quite charming and awesome being... At least, that is what she whispers into my ear sometimes. I guess the BFF and Punk would agree with that voice... and not the one that makes snide remarks, pointing out the faults...

Yesterday, the feeling was so bad I sat sobbing...

Reading a blog about things all girls who are not a size 7 should hear...

It would have been great to hear some of those things back about 30 years ago. The imp would not be penned up struggling to make herself known.

Better late than ever, I guess.

We'll see.

Comments (2)

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wee woman » 3 years ago

I'll start putting back bail money.....

Viva la' IMP

About damn time girl

the long rifle » 3 years ago

This is very good to here!