How Did I Get Here, And Where Is The Next Turn?

Greetings and salutations to all who deem this worthy of your time...

Brought up Apr 20, 2013

My Conversation With Me

Come on. Don't tell me I'm the only one who does this. I have about two voices running in my head at all times. I don't THINK I'm crazy, but I do wonder sometimes. Here is an example from this morning.

Waking, stretching... the damned mockingbird has picked up a new tune, and is going full blast. Sun filtering through the dark green curtains, not quite blacking out the room. I roll over and snuggle deeper, trying to go back to sleep. It's Saturday, after all, with no plans and no Punk to chat with. "Get your butt up and go for your walk."

"Oh, man, the bed feels sooooo nice, warm. I'm going back to sleep."

"Screw that. Get up."

"Okay, okay.." I struggle out of bed, scrubbing at my eyes. Dressed slowly, "This is so stupid. I want to sleep."

"Quit stalling." Shoes on, dragging sweat shirt like a 5 yr old with her blankie. Toss the phone and shirt down in the living room, then toddle to the bathroom. "Is that f**ing scar ever going to fade?"

"It's better than it was, quit bitching."

"Good Lord!! Is that hair or a Chia Pet? Looks like my head sprouted a frigging sheep dog in the night." Brush hair, scowl at the puffy eyes.

"Come on, troll, let's get out there."

Still stalling, grab the phone, sweat shirt, go sit in my chair. Light a smoke, then struggle into the sweatshirt. "Put out the damned cigarette and get going already."

"Cool your jets. I'm going, damnit." Few more puffs. Cough, sneeze.

"See what those damned things are doing? You need to quit, you know?"

"Screw you. I'll quit when I am ready. Shut it." Cig out. Stand and tug the sweat shirt down. Stumble to the door.

"Klutz."

"Can it, chick." Unlock, and head out.

"Phone, nitwit."

"Thththththt," Turn around on the porch, go back for the phone. I have been ordered to never leave on my walk with out it by the brats, and others who know me too well. Shove it in a pocket as I go back out the door.

"Go see if the wisteria is blooming yet."

"I am, hush." Walk along, "Man, my hip bones hurt."

"Because you sit on your can too much."

"Shut up." Walk along, wisteria slightly there, but no fragrance in the air, and what blossoms were there earlier were washed away in the storm two nights ago. "Damn."

"Damn's right."

Walking, walking. "The sun's warmer today. Bright." Stumble.

"Walk much, moron,"

"Can it, bitch. I got this." Joints limbering, moving a bit faster.

"Man, what's the Sheriff's car doing?" parked on one of the less walk friendly streets. Deputy talking to a big guy outside a house.

"Not your biz, Kandy. Walk around it."

"Yeah, yeah," Keep on walking. Miss the turn I had planned to take, and walk back up to my street instead. "Weren't you going to go by and see if those roses are blooming?"

"Aw, man! HHHHH... I'll do that tomorrow." Going pretty good now. "Wow, the lilacs are blooming there. I'd love one of those bushes."

"You know the boy would just mow it down, or the girl would run over it."

"They haven't my roses."

"Just because she bought them, na d threatened to kill him in his sleep if he touched them."

"Sure. Grass needs mowing bad."

"Yeah, that's gonna get done. When he gets tired of listening to you whine about it."

"Well, I'd do it myself if he would show me how to start the damned mower, and if I could pull the damned rip cord."

"Rip cords are on parachutes, dummy." Check the mail. "Cool, a catalog. I really need to get some clothes that fit."

"Yeah, sure. When you find that money tree, we'll strip the sucker bare."

"Yep. Man, I wish the brat would get his car junk off the porch. Looks like Fred's gonna come shuffling out the door."

"She did. (Snicker)"

"Aw, shush, you nut job. I ain't that old yet."

"Right. shuffling along this morning."

"Not now, heifer. Let's get the coffee going. Oh, and raisin bran. Yum..."

"You'd rather have a sausage muffin."

"I bought raisin bran. Can it."

You get the picture. I talk to myself a lot these days...

Hey, don't go hating because my form of crazy is more fun... And it is sometimes...

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wee woman » 5 years ago

do it all the time.... and yes I answer my own questions