How Did I Get Here, And Where Is The Next Turn?

Greetings and salutations to all who deem this worthy of your time...

Brought up Mar 30, 2012

Me and My Blog...

It's been a couple of days, and it isn't that I don't have anything to write. It's that there are so many things I could talk about, it's hard to choose a topic. So, I've decided to write about the blog its self.

I have read a few other blogs, some in research to figure out how to start the thing in the beginning, some because I liked what I read. What really gets me is that some of them are written in such a way, I can't help but wonder who these people really are. Yes, I have been known to swear a blue streak that would make a sailor blush, but I see no reason to do that here.

I have come to these conclusions: Some feel they HAVE to be controversial to get attention. Some are just juvenile delinquents who don't realize how silly they sound. Some are just childish adults who think they are giving people what they want. The ones truly worth reading get lost in the shuffle.

In my quest to become a well rounded (and less rounded weight wise) adult, I have chosen to refrain from being vulgar in my language, and topics. I see no reason to set out to deliberately shock people, or embarass anyone. Maybe that is a little boring. I really don't care.

The numbers of those reading my blog dwindle a bit each month. Yes, it sort of hurts my feelings, but again, people can choose to read or not. Part of my journey is also trying to thicken my skin a bit anyway, so I'll get over it. Those who do read it and keep coming back are greatly appreciated. The rest, well, they can go read the children's blogs where they can get their fill of language and exploits best kept from the general public. Frankly, I hope someday they wake up and see how rediculous they are, but human nature being as it is, I doubt it will happen until their children or grand children embarass them with what they say and do, if then.

So, I write for myself. if others read and like it, fine. I am working toward not caring if anyone likes me or not anyway. I have always been a people pleaser, practically begging to be liked. It has always upset me to learn that someone didn't like me, and I would scramble around trying to discover why. I would bend over backwards to do what ever I thought necessary to be liked.

I am a natural clown at heart, though those freaks in makeup give me the willies. I am a smart person with a lot of interests, some I am passionate about. I read almost anything. I detest the pseudo intellectuals who claim to be experts at things when they only have a general knowledge of many subjects. When I am wrong, I say so, and sometimes, when I know I'm right, I might just agree to keep peace, or argue until I drop, depending on the person, and my interest in the topic. I see no reason to be something I'm not anymore, no reason to hide parts of myself just so people will like me. Maybe I am maturing, finally. Maybe I am just waking up to discover that I really don't need for people who don't know me to like me. I once told a friend that I am a walking contradiction. I am. I would love for people to like what I write. My writing is a small fraction of who I am. The rest, well they can take it or leave it. I really don't give a damn... sometimes.

Comments (3)

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Sandro » 6 years ago

+1. I read this blog sometimes.

Connie » 6 years ago

Well Kandy, I like who you are. . , and I keep on reading and enjoying your humor and honesty. Thank you for taking me on your journey.

Holly » 6 years ago

I've set this up in a RSS reader (Google) -- do you know if that "counts" in your reader count? I know it must be quite a challenge to keep coming up with something to write about.