How Did I Get Here, And Where Is The Next Turn?

Greetings and salutations to all who deem this worthy of your time...

Brought up Sep 18, 2016


Today marks my 3rd anniversary at work. If it hadn't been for Facebook I would have completely forgotten it. It's been an interesting haul, let me tell ya.

I still like my job, more or less. Mostly because I am trusted to come in and get it done. I rarely have a manager tell me anything about what to do, and I love that. It makes me smile.

What also makes me smile more is when some of the younger, and not so younger, folks come to me to chat. They tell me their troubles, ask my advice, or just need a friendly ear. They know they can trust me for some reason. Makes me feel all gooey inside. happy

The only thing I really don't like is the knee problem I didn't have before working. It doesn't seem to be improving much, though it lessens a lot when I can sit instead of standing to work.

Anyway, i t was kind of FB to jog my old gray fuzzies with that nugget.

It's been a lazy day. I've slept, eaten, fiddled on FB, and slept some more. Sleep has become that elusive friend that avoids me way too often lately.

I swear, I really wonder if I might not be getting a bit psycho form lack of sleep.

Shut up, Punk! I know, how would I know the difference, right?

I will share another little thing. I have sort of been reclaiming a bit of my youth lately.

I've become semi obsessed with the Osmonds, again.

Don't judge me!

The music is still fabulous, and it brings me to a carefree place I wish I could have had when I was younger.

I just finished rereading Donny's book recently, and yesterday finished Jay's. Different views of the same stories, and then completely different stories, all painting such a wonderful picture of a time I wish I could have enjoyed more.

I am now waiting for two other books. Wayne's and Merrill's...

Hey, I said no judging.

I plan to get Marie's as well. Later. But it would be cool if Alan and Jimmy were on the list as well.

Like all my little obsessions, I know this will burn out eventually, but I am enjoying it while it lasts.

I hum the songs at work, and smile.

Reclaiming that time, and making the little girl inside happy has become a priority for me.

It quiets my mind for a time, and makes me feel a little less anxious. Most of all, though, I feel some of the bruised and battered parts of my heart healing.

That, my friend, is one of the best feelings ever.

Life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. We aren't supposed to have to spend it worrying over everything and feeling lacking. That is what I am working hard to overcome most of all. That feeling that my life has been just filling a space in the universe, not really lived.

I envy those who have such lovely memories and the chances to make more.

I long to feel like I am more than wasted space.

I am trying.

But that is difficult alone.

Any way, don't cry for me, Argentina. I ain't done yet!


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